I have to totally come clean about something, I don't normally post really personal things but I am today. Lately, well since we moved in July I have felt as if I am just barely getting through. My days, my weeks, my months just life in general.
Moving was hard on me. I know your thinking its nearly been a year - Yes I'm totally aware but from my perspective and also an OCD sufferer its been extremely hard. Mentally and Physically.
I miss things that the kids don't even think of. I've asked them many questions but seems that I am the only one suffering.
My husband has tried to help me relieve my feelings but its just not really helped.
Changing homes, friends, churches and our homeschool group was huge for me, I guess not for anyone else. Don't get me wrong I know my kids miss their friends. We still write to them and have seen several of them often. We moved 2 hours away and I'm thankful that its not further.
I struggle just "getting through" some days. I've been praying about it a lot. I want God to help me through this and I know that he will ease my fears and anxiety about the situation. I have been struggling with school work and feel as if I'm just not getting enough done.
Getting through at this time is seriously something I'm working on by the minute. I finally had to speak with a family doctor over the issue and hopefully the things she has given and talked to me about will straighten out.
I'm here to tell you that sometimes just "getting though" is ok. I've never felt like this in all my life. The unknown of this feeling isn't well pleasing with me. I love to know what's going on with everything and am normally very organized and in charge of everything. This is a new season of our homeschooling and some of it is kinda nice but I really thrive on routine and schedule so do my children.
I just keep thinking this over and over... I'm not alone. I know there is a powerful God that is right with me watching over me. This is for a purpose.
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6
He is watching over me and has only blessings to offer.
"God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it" 1 Corinthians 10:13
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
So momma's if you have ever went through something like this or if your going though it now with me, just remember these verses and pray and then pray some more because I know this will pass. I know that this is just a season in our homeschooling journey.
Thanks for this! Sometimes sharing a private part of yourself is encouraging to others! :)
ReplyDeleteAs I read this I discover that your children have a foundation with you, which is why they didn't suffer the same and adapt to the change easy. You keep a constant for them so they feel secure.
ReplyDeleteMaking huge changes as an adult leaves us feeling vulnerable. Even when our foundation is with the Lord and our family, we connect with like minded people and they help to shore us up from time to time.
Sharing your personal feeling is important and may help others who come across your post. Many find themselves "going through" sometime so when we share those moments we let others know they are not alone.
Prayers offered and will be continued for you and yours.
BETH
I think it's perfectly fine to just "get through" on occasion. I think that most Christian women have found themselves barely hanging on some days, weeks or even months! If we are trying to live the life of Christian woman and please God then it's only natural to feel rough sometimes. I know that as a Christian, wife, mother and homeschooler I often feel like too much is being asked of me. It's those times that I try to make my time with God more of a priority. If anyone can refresh me it's God, so spending time in prayer or reading my Bible is often a good way for me to reconnect with what God is really asking me to do. I often find that the reason I am feeling so stretched is because I am trying to do things that God isn't asking me to do or that aren't necessary to my life. On occasion I have to realize that it's ok to let that other stuff go. :) Hugs.
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